Delta: Work change

Showing posts with label Work change. Show all posts

Recovery: Sit. Stare Into Distance.

Seasons can be busy. But the past two months of my 'season' have been too busy as I engrossed myself full force into a big challenge at work. Loved the challenge but I've come to learn that being over busy leaves no margin for relationship or self. Actually, I think the past months were the busiest that I have ever been (I hope that speaks more about the season and it does my life). Breathing room is not only good, it's necessary.

The past four days on vacation, away from routine (in a midwest white tennis shoe cut off t-shirt fishing town on the shores of Lake Erie) gave me the space (and anonymity) that I needed. Although I don't think I realized it until day 2, when I slowly stopped checking my email, stopped swiping my phone, and allowed work thoughts to slip away... like the sailboat I was watching drift into the horizon.

Here's a recap of my adventurous days:

Day 1: Sit at beach. Stare into distance.
Day 2: Drink 2nd to best latte I've ever had (best latte I had was at a little shop in Chicago suburbs that's now out of business- sad). Stare into distance in between flipping pages of a book.
Day 3: Enjoy latte again. Enjoy staring at distance again.
Day 4: Morning latte enjoyment continues. Finish book. Watch distance- again.

In between staring and the infinite daze I found myself in, I was able to fall deeper in love with Brandon and revive my soul. My lesson is obvious: don't go too long without space for yourself. I know this is 101 stuff but it gets me every time. I love to work hard but I need to remember to take rest periods. No one will call a break but me. My new plan: build in time to rejuvenate just as I build in time to work.

How do you know when you've been in a busy season for too long? What do you do to rest?

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Rest Stop Brought to You By Painted Toes

"A Rest Stop Keeps Honey Bees From Dropping Dead From Overwork" was a recent headline in a Fast Company Co. Design article. I could probably stop typing at this moment and let you ponder that line for as long as your brain wants. Are you in ministry? Are you doing life? Do you work? Do you volunteer? Are you a parent? Could you use a rest stop?

Before I continue, let me be clear. I'm not saying slow down. I'm not saying quit. I'm only suggesting a rest stop. I used to work at a place that iterated and reiterated the importance of slowing down... everything was positioned to be slower, to be easier, do less, be less. That messaging was like yellowed fingernails screeching down an old black chalkboard. Gross.

Even though that kind of language is painful for me, I can see the value in taking a rest stop- in letting yourself be absorbed in quiet moments where life moves at a pace meant for those who are listless. It can be difficult to allow yourself rest after pacing along the edge of burnout.

I found that sometimes resting is as easy as painting my nails. That sounds really 'girly' but it's true. I actually need an activity to transition me into a rest stop. There are times when a rest stop actually feels like the last thing (on my overgrown list) that I need. I know I'm not alone with this one- there are plenty of workaholics out there who go at life pretty hard (just say no to more workahol).

What things do you do to help you transition into a rest stop? How do you avoid burnout?

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Moving Mega Project 2 Degrees

Tonight I'm going to do something different than usual. I'm going to make dinner. (As i write this, Brandon tells me- you can't write that unless you're actually going to do it). He knows me.

What is something that you need to do different than usual?

I have a friend who gave me the phrase: 2 degrees. Her and I are working on what I endearingly refer to as mega project. Mega project can play tricks on my mind and make me think it's a Godzilla-sized jenga puzzle waiting to collapse on me and my house. (Side note: this is a mean mind trick because I've been working really hard on my house lately.)

So back to the point- 2 degrees of change. I've started thinking, what can we do today to move mega project 2 degrees further along?

It's helped. Although mega project is a gladiator, I can move it 2 degrees each time I meet with it.

When I think about change at work and in places of my life, I just need to think: 2 degrees. It helps me do things different than usual. That said, I'm taking my 2 degree motivation, turning pandora on, and going to make dinner... (see paragraph 1).

How are you navigating your change? Do you have phrases that help you 'right size' your mega project?

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I Fought the Root & the Root Won

When I fell I told myself: don't write about this.... don't write about this.... don't write about this... I'm writing about this.

Saturday morning was cool and for the first time in a month, I was looking forward to the long run in my prep for the Chicago 1/2 marathon. All I had to do was run out 4.5 miles then turn around and run home. At the 5 mile mark I tripped on a root (it was a really big root) and fell across the dirt trail like I was sliding into home plate. Left in my wake was a dirt cloud, some serious skin loss on the palms of my hands, and skinned knees. Tree root: 1, scarred Hanna: 0.

There's a lesson in here. Training this summer has been hard, humid hard, but I'm getting to be a better runner (sans 'the fall'). I think that's how life is- we look for the finish line but forget that most of life happens in the 'training'. I know for me, I'm obsessed with getting to the next stop but most of the important training and growth in my life has happened when I fell, had to get up, and keep going- without turning around or hiding. My growth has happened, largely in part, when I wasn't comfortable or satisfied. I guess things don't always go as planned and I guess giving myself time to grow is okay, even if I fall.

"I hated every minute of training, but I said, don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion." - Muhammad Ali

For the curious readers (and for saving face- since I got beat up by a root), I ran the rest of the way home gladiator style, blood dripping down my dirt covered leg and all. Beat that Chuck Norris!

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10 Changes in 2 Years

Although I can admit that the past 2 years have been difficult, I can confidently write that I am thankful for them.

Sitting sweaty palmed in my first interview I asked for a challenge. Weeks later, when I was offered the position about 562 challenges plopped into my lap.

Hello challenges.

The best part of a challenge is the opportunity for growth. Here's a list of my favorite changes in the past 2 years.

I love my husband more
I love God more
I am learning how to love me
I decided to (finally) sign up for a 1/2 marathon (and not just talk about it)
I found people
I enjoy our 1 family tradition: #PizzaFriday
I discovered (discovering) that I like to solve problems
I have an excuse to not attend every. single. family. event.
I'm forced to learn everyday
I can call Chicago home

There it is- the best part of the past 2 years in 10 easy to read points.

Keep on movin'

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A Product Of

When I said, "we are just a product of our environment," I wanted to crumble the words up and swallow them down as if they were never spoken. Time travel machine be invented sooner.

If you want to make big change, you have to start small.
Jessica Jackley (co-founder of KIVA.org)

My deepest fear is that I will loose the sparkle of who I am as I adapt to the culture I'm in. When I studied in Mexico, I was so cognizant of how much I stuck out- no matter how desperate I wanted to assimilate to the majority. I tried, but once a mid-West white girl, always a mid-West white girl. In Mexico, I craved identification with the hispanic culture but in this new place, I crave change without being consumed.

Do the little changes we make add up to something more than romantic dreams of a utopian workplace? When I look back over 2 years, will I see the small ripples of change compounded over time?

As I grow, I see, in full 20/20 vision, that change also starts with yourself. I can only be out of who I am. Big change starts with self.

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Hoy Es Viernes

My high school Spanish class teacher deemed Fridays as a day to emphasize school spirit. The class would celebrate with "Hoy Es Viernes!" (It's Friday!) and do football cheers. It was contrived celebration by an overly enthusiastic (and a little strange) Spanish teacher. Regardless of my judgements about the Friday excitement- it worked. Students got into the whole thing and actually participated.

This brings me to my question of the day: Can formulaic fun turn into authentic fun? Does the saying fake it until you make it hold true?

Take this one step further...In life, at work, in relationships- can a person pretend to be healthy and then someday magically the person really is healthy?

I don't know the answers but there is something scary about faking our way through relationships, or life. I wonder though, if I want to change maybe it starts with faking since change goes against human nature. Change is uncomfortable so faking is a way to act out how the change would feel. If change it a tight rope walk with sweaty palms, faking it is a safety net.

Top business thinker and advocate for change, Gary Hamel, addressed church leaders:

We are not going to get fundamentally better at changing lives until we get fundamentally better at changing our churches.

I think that we're not going to get better at changing lives or churches until we are able to change ourselves. Changing the person I'm closest to, me, could be one of the most difficult challenges.

Hoy es viernes!

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Turning Point

Tonight marks the turning point. Long hours and lack of boundaries have filled personal time and encourage me to become the person I don't want to be. The path I'm on equals the path to self depletion. A busy season has stretched into busy months. I. can't. keep. up.

The war stories of those who have gone before me serve as warning signs: dead end ahead. I feel the thinness of the raw emotion that sits just below the surface waiting to tear open and burst into an ugly mess.

It took a hard week, a few slaps in the face, some good friends, and gentle nudges (some not so gentle) to remind me life is bigger than work. So like any problem I solve, I'll envision where I want to go, define where I am, and figure out how to get there. Who I am is okay and I don't have to prove that to anyone, even myself.

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Oversimplified Mess

Even my dinners have become an oversimplified mess. Macaroni and cheese dramatically improved my dinner from the usual bag of popcorn- 1 min. 45 sec. and wah-la dinner is served. Thanks blue box of cheesy processed noodles.

Food cravings aside, I’m tired. I just need to write it. Tired.

I simply can’t differentiate between what it means to grow verses what it means to be in over your head. At what cost am I growing?

When will the glass ball that is life shatter because I can’t juggle it anymore?

When did juggling become so hard…so draining… so never-ending?

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